The Pain of Indifference
Elie Wiesel, a Nobel Peace Prize winning writer, once said, "The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference; the opposite of art is not ugliness, it's indifference; the opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference; and the opposite of life is not death, it's indifference."
This is a quote that I was never able to relate to until I experienced the "Steroid Era" in baseball.
Like most kids growing up in the 1990's, I became enamored with the legendary home run chase of 1998 between Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa. Even as a Brewer fan that was watching two division opponents slug it out; I loved it.
Then 2005 came along and the congressional hearing about steroids took place. McGwire and Sosa were put on the hot seat, and both players failed miserably.
Sosa read a prepared statement and then hid behind his 'lack of familiarity' with the English language while McGwire said 'I plead the fifth' about 40 different ways.
I was disappointed in these players to say the least, but nothing came close to the disdain I felt for Barry Bonds during the BALCO scandal. Barry's arrogant attitude combined with the mountain of facts against him made him the biggest villain since Darth Vader.
But good did come from the spite I felt for Barry Bonds. The good that came from it was hope.
I could look at Alex Rodriguez and Albert Pujols and look forward to the future. I had faith that these clean players would return integrity to the record books and swiftly remove the home run crown from Bonds' bulking head.
The final dagger was stuck in me when A-Rod's positive 2003 test was revealed, and his subsequent admission to using performance-enhancing drugs was spoken. I could no longer hang my hat on anyone.
If a player with a track record like Alex Rodriguez's used steroids, then whom can we trust? If probably the most talented and successful youngster most of us have ever seen used steroids, who didn't fall into that trap?
It's impossible to answer those questions, and that is where my indifference emerges.
Everyone is looking for a stance on Manny Ramirez. There's the usual range of unquestioning
support to undeniable hatred, and few people in-between.
However, in-between is where I am. I saw the Manny news and didn't look twice. I don't care that he was allowed to go on a rehab assignment prior to his return to the Dodgers, and I don't care that he has even returned. A fake 2003 steroid list was circled around, and I didn't care about that either.
I would give anything to return to my state of ignorance about steroids in baseball. I would even love to return to a time where I could funnel my anger towards a single player like Bonds, because at least that elevated other players.
In hindsight, I prefer the positive tests were never released. Alas, they were, and I can only look to the future. All I can do is dream of a clean game and for the romanticized word of "purity" to return to America's pastime.
When will that time come? Maybe never, and that's the pain of indifference.
This is a quote that I was never able to relate to until I experienced the "Steroid Era" in baseball.
Like most kids growing up in the 1990's, I became enamored with the legendary home run chase of 1998 between Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa. Even as a Brewer fan that was watching two division opponents slug it out; I loved it.
Then 2005 came along and the congressional hearing about steroids took place. McGwire and Sosa were put on the hot seat, and both players failed miserably.
Sosa read a prepared statement and then hid behind his 'lack of familiarity' with the English language while McGwire said 'I plead the fifth' about 40 different ways.
I was disappointed in these players to say the least, but nothing came close to the disdain I felt for Barry Bonds during the BALCO scandal. Barry's arrogant attitude combined with the mountain of facts against him made him the biggest villain since Darth Vader.
But good did come from the spite I felt for Barry Bonds. The good that came from it was hope.
I could look at Alex Rodriguez and Albert Pujols and look forward to the future. I had faith that these clean players would return integrity to the record books and swiftly remove the home run crown from Bonds' bulking head.
The final dagger was stuck in me when A-Rod's positive 2003 test was revealed, and his subsequent admission to using performance-enhancing drugs was spoken. I could no longer hang my hat on anyone.
If a player with a track record like Alex Rodriguez's used steroids, then whom can we trust? If probably the most talented and successful youngster most of us have ever seen used steroids, who didn't fall into that trap?
It's impossible to answer those questions, and that is where my indifference emerges.
Everyone is looking for a stance on Manny Ramirez. There's the usual range of unquestioning
support to undeniable hatred, and few people in-between. However, in-between is where I am. I saw the Manny news and didn't look twice. I don't care that he was allowed to go on a rehab assignment prior to his return to the Dodgers, and I don't care that he has even returned. A fake 2003 steroid list was circled around, and I didn't care about that either.
I would give anything to return to my state of ignorance about steroids in baseball. I would even love to return to a time where I could funnel my anger towards a single player like Bonds, because at least that elevated other players.
In hindsight, I prefer the positive tests were never released. Alas, they were, and I can only look to the future. All I can do is dream of a clean game and for the romanticized word of "purity" to return to America's pastime.
When will that time come? Maybe never, and that's the pain of indifference.
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